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2 In advice/ Personal

How to Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

As homo-sapiens, we can’t help but compare ourselves to others. It’s just a human thing to do. Even if we don’t mean to, we compare ourselves to others. Particularly, we compare our lives, our accomplishments and our looks to other people’s. We wonder why we can’t look the way someone else does, or why we can’t have a job or a lifestyle that somebody else possesses. We compare our talents to other people’s, and wonder why we can’t complete a task as easily as someone else can. We also use comparing ourselves to others to feed our egos, too, by thinking things like “I’m glad I’m not doing what she’sdoing” as though we are better than them.
It becomes so easy to obsess over the lives of other people, especially in a society full of internet based lifestyles, and easy access to social media. Pretty photos of “ideal people” and stories of great adventures we wish we could do are constantly shared in our view. Even though we only see a tiny portion of a person’s life online, we for some reason assume that they have it all together. We spend a lot of time trying to be more like another person because we believe it will make us happy, but it won’t.

Comparison is evil, and the worst thing we can do for our confidence. It makes us feel like we are constantly not good enough, and that there is always something better to accomplish because somebody else has done it, or we think we should look like another person because they receive a lot of positive attention. We strive to be like other people that we would admire, which is a positive thing to an extent, but in the process, we can lose ourselves. It’s normal, and quite a good thing to be inspired by stories we hear, things we see, and people we meet. But, when you begin to assess these things against what you have, it becomes dangerous. We start putting ourselves down because we are not like this ideal we have in our minds. The more we compare, the more we reduce the goodness in ourselves and stop seeing how great we already are.
 
Our society gives us online access to what we believe is the full portrait of a person’s life, and we are unfortunately often subtly encouraged to compare ourselves to others. Why are we comparing ourselves to people like the Kardashians – someone who is just as human as you or I? We all have accomplishments and beautiful features, and being famous with help from teams of people to construct a very particular image shouldn’t be what we compare ourselves to. Viewing their lavish lifestyles makes us feel as if we should look different or we should be doing more with our days.
 
What you do matters just as much as what your favourite celebrities do. There are always going to be people in the world who have less or more than you, who might be better or worse than you at something. And you know what? There are people out there who wish they have the same things that you have. There is no need to compare yourself to others, because every life is individual and unique. Own your struggles, your fears, your accomplishments.
 
The only person you should be comparing yourself to is who you were yesterday.


 

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2 Comments

  • Reply
    Kevin Kissane
    May 6, 2016 at 10:46 pm

    Ugh. I need to let this lesson sink in.

  • Reply
    Bethany Ashley
    May 6, 2016 at 11:55 pm

    I think we all do sometimes, I'll read this to you every day <3 xxxx

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